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What is Balance? Have you found it?

Balance, the new buzz word in health for this decade. It is what we all want, what we all need, and yet most don’t even know what it truly is or how to get it. So the search continues.

It hit me this summer when I was describing to my daughter, how to drive her grandfather’s boat. “You can’t just steer ‘straight’ when driving a boat. Instead you are constantly course correcting. A little to the right, then left to adjust for the waves or to miss a log in the water. If you make any sudden or quick turns you are likely to really rock the boat and have to slow way down to get headed back on your chosen path.” As I was saying the words it struck me that this is a great way to describe how to achieve greater balance in most people’s lives. We cannot always anticipate rough seas, so we need to be ready to change course at any time. Like many of you, I have spent many years in search of the perfect balance. Dedicating the better part of my last six years to this specifically. Whether that be in my weight, exercise, relationships, career, time, and education. I read copious magazines and books, took several yoga classes, watched any inspirational show I could, all trying to find the perfect solution to being in balance. While those are all “healthy” things individually or one at a time, they were taking time away from other areas in my life that were great and thus created more imbalance than I had before. What I needed was a magic formula.
 
What do the people in my life, that seem to have achieved this wonderful calming balance, have that I didn’t have? Those people aren’t too much different than the rest of us who are trying our best to live well, but they do have something in common. They are able to identify more quickly when they need to make a change within their life and do so in a timely matter, gently, and without with drastic force.
 
Once I found greater balance in my life, one thing became very clear and apparent to me, that the same concept can be applied to balance all areas of my life, in a similar fashion. More importantly you can’t balance one without the others being in their own current state of balance.
 
Small changes, a little at a time tend to be best. Don’t take a hard turn to quickly or you will have to take a few steps back to change your course and get it back on track. Does this sound familiar to you?
 
I am not here to say that on occasion, some individuals who are in a tough or challenging place might not need a severe reaction to make severe change. However, for most of us looking to achieve greater “balance” in our current lives, I have found some common ways to do so.
 


3 Simple Steps to achieve greater balance in your own life!

 
First: Accept where you are today. We can’t worry about the future, or fret about the past. We need to be comfortable right where we are. Taking a look at all areas of our lives to see where we might be lacking, then take action to make change in those areas. The big question I get asked is…“How to do so without disrupting the things that are going well in my life today?
 
It is actually very simple. Let’s be clear, it won’t always be easy, but it will be simple. As you evaluate the things you need to change and create goals for them, you will know which area(s) of your life they will affect.
 
Second: We are all willing to rise to the occasion or move time and space in order to do something special.. so we need to do the same in our lives to create our goals. The trick is to make sure we don’t drop the ball completely in one area of our lives that was “working” before we made changes to begin with. That would make us have to completely stop, build that area back up, then go back to your goal. Does that sound familiar?
 
Take a few moments to decide which things you need to maintain for your own health and relationships, versus those that you can cut back for a short period of time while you accomplish your goal. When you are clear with your intentions, you will achieve your goal, and have realistic expectations set for those around you, as to what you had to temporarily suspend to achieve them. Thus adding a little more of this and a little less of that, in order to keep peace and balance as you move through life.
 
Each new day, month, year brings new challenges and opportunities. We want to “do it all,” but if we do, everything suffers a little bit.. Instead. Why not make deliberate choices to adjust a few things temporarily and then add then back when the task is finished.
 
When I chose to write my first book. I had a family meeting to discuss how it would affect more than just my life. Not only did it help my family to learn why these goals were important to me, but they then understood why I needed to set aside added time each week to achieve a short term goal. It was important that I kept up with all the other parts of my life I need to stay whole. Exercise, eating well, quality time with family – so needed to remove some time on social media or screen time to make more time to write. I also assured my husband and children, that things would change back, once the goal was complete, and followed through with that.
 
Third: One thing in life is constant.. change. So keep an eye on where you are in all areas of your life and adjust as needed throughout your days. Too many find balance one week and think if they repeat the same thing week after week, that they will maintain that balance. The problem is, just like water in a lake, there are always unexpected turbulence or other obstacles that your boat may have to steer around or change courses in order to move past. That is where the small daily or weekly adjustments come in handy. Otherwise you wait too long, when things feel out of control, and make a rash decision that almost flips you over and forces you to halt everything in order to gain back control.
 
The key is to make small changes daily, or one decisive larger move with precision, and make small course corrections to accommodate the needs for a snap shop in time. With that, greater moment to moment balance can be achieved.
 

 
Have questions about this post or want more information on personal coaching with Mary? Send her a message!

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